Quotes of real bozos

In light of the current economic bailout problem, that we are seeing in Wall Street due the bozos managed companies I decided to go ahead and look at what they say about themselves and their mission statements. Undoubtedly, I found bozos CEOs do have a sick sense of humor. These are still current quotes on these companies’ websites.

Washington Mutual
"You'll know it right away: We're not like other banks. We've always been about making things better for people—our customers, employees and neighbors." – Right!

Fannie Mae
“Fannie Mae has a federal charter and operates in America's secondary mortgage market to ensure that mortgage bankers and other lenders have enough funds to lend to home buyers at low rates. Our job is to help those who house America.” – Really? So, where are those funds?

Freddie Mac
“Freddie Mac's mission is to provide liquidity, stability and affordability to the housing market.” – Hahahahahahaha, sick, Freddie!

Lehman Brothers
“Our mission is to build unrivaled partnerships with and value for our clients, through the knowledge, creativity, and dedication of our people, leading to superior returns to our shareholders” – I wonder what they meant by shareholders? Their board of directors?

Merrill Lynch
“Merrill Lynch demonstrates its commitments to clients and shareholders through the firm's emphasis on excellence, integrity and ethical behavior.” – Until they don’t!

Wachovia
“Wachovia is committed to being the best, most trusted and admired financial services company. We carefully consider the impact of our business activities on shareholders, customers, communities, employees, and the environment. We leverage our social, economic, and human assets to deliver business results in a way that supports fair business practices and sustainability. Our Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) Report highlights our social responsibility commitment and values in action.” – You can decide on this one!

Last but not least, the greatest, sickest joke of all

US Treasury – Mission statement
“Serve the American people and strengthen national security by managing the U.S. Government's finances effectively, promoting economic growth and stability, and ensuring the safety, soundness, and security of the U.S. and international financial systems.” – I wonder if Paulson ever read this. Anyhow, the biggest BOZO award goes to him.